Mu rukundo cyangwa mu rushako hari ubwo bigora umuntu gusobanurira mugenzi we icyo umutegerejemo. Kenshi bigaterwa n’imiterere y’icyo kintu cyangwa imiterere y’umubano wabo bombi. Muri iyi nyigisho turagaruka ku bintu 2 umuntu wese aba ategereje k’ uwo bakundana/ bashakanye ariko bikamugora kubimusobanurira. Turareba n’icyo wakora kugira ngo ibyo bintu bye kwangiza imibanire hagati yawe n’uwo mukundana/ mwashakanye.
Kumufasha muri byose nta kiguzi, nta kwiganyira
Kimwe mu byatumye Imana ishyiraho urushako ni ukugira ngo ihe umuntu umufasha umukwiriye.1 Itangiriro 2:18 Kandi Uwiteka Imana iravuga iti “Si byiza ko umuntu aba wenyine, reka muremere umufasha umukwiriye.” Umuntu wese rero aba ategereje ko uwo bakundana/ bashakanye amubera umufasha mu nshingano ze zose nta kiguzi kandi akabikora atongeyeho kwiganyira. Kubera rero ko gusaba cyangwa gukenera ubufasha ku muntu ubwabyo hari ukuntu biba biremerereye umutima, ni gake umuntu atinyuka gusobanura ko ubwo bufasha abukeneye nta kiguzi kandi butongeyeho kwiganyira. Ibi rero iyo bigonganye n’uko mu busanzwe, iyo ukoreye umuntu ikintu uba witeze ko ari bwishyure ikiguzi cyacyo, bituma umuntu wakoreye undi ibintu runaka nta kiguzi yisanga yongeyeho kwiganyira nk’uburyo bwo kwicuza cyangwa kunamira (to mourn ) icyo kiguzi byamutwaye kubikora. Nubwo aba yabikoze nta kiguzi ategereje k’uwo yabikoreye. Gusaba ikiguzi mbere yo kugira icyo umuntu akora cyangwa kwiganyira nyuma yo gukora ibintu ntakiguzi byose bisa n’uburyo karemano busanzwe bwo gukora ibintu. Nyamara, iyo bigenze gutyo hagati y’abakundana / abashakanye bibangamira imibanire yabo, kuburyo ari imigenzereze ukeneye kwitandukanya nayo hakiri kare.
Reka nguhe urugero rwagufasha kubyumva neza. Tekereza nk’umugore n’umugabo bashakanye. Maze igihe kimwe umugabo akisanga afite inshingano nyinshi mu kazi, bigatuma atabasha kubona umwanya uhagije wo kwita kubyo mu rugo. Bigasaba ko umugore ariwe ukora byose. Biragoye ko umugabo arenga agasaba uyu mugore we, usanzwe uri gukora ibyo mu rugo byose wenyine, kubikora nta kiguzi na gito asabye umugabo we kandi atiganyira. Ariko nubwo uyu mugabo atatinyuka gusaba umugore we gukora byose nta kiguzi kandi atiganyira nibyo aba amutegerejemo! Ubibona neza igihe uyu mugore akoze ibitandukanye n’ibyo umugabo amutegerejemo. Nk’urugero, iyo uyu mugore akoze ibyo byose maze akarenzaho kwiganyira. Wenda akajya yirirwa buri kanya avuga ukuntu atakibasha kwiyitaho cyangwa kuruhuka kubera ko imirimo yo mu rugo yamubanye myinshi. Uzasanga, nubwo ibyo uyu mugore avuga ari ukuri, birenga bigateza umwiryane hagati ye n’uwo bashakanye. Kuri uyu mugabo, kuba umugore we yiganyira, bisa no kwikunda. Kubera ko ibyo umugore yabujijwe no kwita ku rugo, umugabo we nawe yabibujijwe n’inshingano z’akazi. Kandi bombi bari kubikorera urugo rwabo. Kuba rero, ku bantu babiri bombi bigomwe, umwe yarenga ukiganyira bisa no kwikunda cyangwa gusuzugura imvune za mugenzi we kandi ibyo byangiza imibanire yabo.
Umuntu rero ushaka kubaka urugo rwiza, yitoza gufasha mugenzi we atabara ikiguzi bimusabye kandi akirinda kongeraho kwiganyira. Agakorera mugenzi we akurikiza kimwe Yesu yabwiye abigishwa be muri Luka 6:35. Ngo bajye baguriza badategereje inyungu, kuko ibyo aribyo bifite ingororano nyinshi kandi aribyo bikwiye kuranga abana b’Isumbabyose kuko nayo igirira neza ababi n’indashima. 2 Luka 6:35 Ahubwo mukunde abanzi banyu, mubagirire neza, mugurize abantu mudatekereza ko bazabishyura. Ni bwo ingororano zanyu zizaba nyinshi, namwe muzaba abana b’Isumbabyose kuko igirira neza ababi n’indashima.
Kumushyigikira muri byose nta kubara
Abantu benshi usanga batinda cyane kubyo bakoreye uwo bakundana/ bashakanye ndetse ugasanga bari kugereranya ibyo bakoze n’ibyo bakorewe. Kubara ibyo wakoreye uwo mukundana / mwashakanye, ni uburyo bumwe bwo kwitandukanya nawe kuko biba bimeze nko kurushanwa kandi ntawurushanwa n’uwo bakina mu ikipe imwe. Iyo abantu bakina mu ikipe imwe baharanira gushyira hamwe ngo barebe ko ikipe yabo yatsinda aho kurushanwa. Iki kintu cyo kwirebaho no kurushanwa ariko, hari ukuntu usanga biri muri kamere yacu nk’abantu. Kuburyo kenshi tubikora tutanabitekerejeho, bigatuma abantu bamwe bibwira ko ari ko ubuzima bukwiye kugenda. Ariko ni ukwibeshya. Ijambo ry’Imana ritubwira ko mu rushako, umugabo n’umugore baba bahindutse umubiri umwe.3 Itangiriro 2:24 Ni cyo gituma umuntu azasiga se na nyina akabana n’umugore we akaramata bombi bakaba umubiri umwe kandi rigategeka abagabo, by’umwihariko, gukunda abagore babo nk’uko bakunda imibiri yabo. 4 Abefeso 5:28-31 28Uko ni ko abagabo bakwiriye gukunda abagore babo nk’imibiri yabo. Ukunda umugore we aba yikunda, 29kuko ari nta muntu wakwanga umubiri we, ahubwo yawugaburira akawukuyakuya nk’uko Kristo abigirira Itorero, 30kuko turi ingingo z’umubiri we. 31#Itang 2.24 Ni cyo gituma umuntu azasiga se na nyina akabana n’umugore we akaramata, bombi bakaba umubiri umwe. Kubara ibyo ukorera mugenzi wawe rero bibusanye n’iri hame, ry’uko umugabo n’umugore bashyingiranwe bahinduka umubiri umwe, kuko bishyira uri gukora ibikorwa runaka ku ruhande rumwe n’uri kubikorerwa bikamushyira ku rundi, aho kubareba nk’ikipe imwe. Umuntu ubikora wese rero aba yitandukanije n’uwo bakundana / bashakanye.
Reka nguhe urugero rwagufasha kubyumva neza. Tekereza umugabo n’umugore bashakanye. Maze nk’urugero umugore akagira uburwayi butuma akeneye kwitabwaho n’umugabo muri byose kuburyo n’inshingano zose z’urugo zisigara ariwe zireba. Uyu mugabo gukomeza kubara ibyo akorera umugore we bya buri munsi, n’uko yita ku rugo wenyine, maze akumva umugore hari ibyo amugomba ni ukwitekereza nk’utari mu ikipe imwe n’ umugore we. Nubwo ari ukuri ko uyu mugabo ariwe wita kuri uyu mugore kandi akaba ari nawe wita ku rugo rwabo. Umugabo watekereza ko hari icyo umugore we amugomba kubera ibyo yaba yihakanye umugore we, kuko byaba bivuze ko yumva ibyo akora hari undi wagakwiye kubikora. Nk’aho hari undi mugabo w’uyu mugore cyangwa undi nyiri uru rugo. Iyo abakinnyi bakina mu ikipe imwe ntabwo umuntu atinda kuwa wateye umupira mu izamu, icy’ingenzi aba ari uko ikipe yatsinze. Kubara ibyo wakoreye mugenzi wawe kandi; bimwambura agaciro mu maso yawe. Bituma arekeraho kuba umuntu mureshya, agahinduka uri munsi yawe kuko hari icyo uba umurusha wamuhaye. Ni nako kandi na we kumva ko hari icyo akugomba bituma yitakariza icyizere kuko yakubereye umutwaro. Kandi ibyo byangiza imibanire yanyu ndetse cyane.
Umugabo n’umugore iyo bashyingiranwe bahinduka umubiri umwe. Nk’uko nta muntu wakwirata ko yitaye ku mubiri we, cyangwa ngo awishyuze ibyo yawuhaye, ni ko ntawukwiye kubara ibyo yakoreye uwo bashakanye. Kuko kwita ku mubiri wawe ni inshingano zawe kandi ni n’inyungu zawe. Umugabo ushaka kubaka urugo rwiza yitoza gukunda umugore we nk’uko yikunda. Akamukorera byose nk’ukorera umubiri we. Kimwe n’uko n’umugore ushaka kubaka urugo rwiza yitoza gukora inshingano ze atabara ibyo yakoze. Mbese nka wa mukozi w’ imburamumaro Yesu yabwiye abigishwa be muri Luka 17:10, ngo nimumara gukora ibyo mwategetswe byose mujye muvuga muti turi abagaragu b’imburamumaro. 5 Luka 17:10 Nuko namwe nimumara gukora ibyo mwategetswe byose mujye muvuga muti ‘Turi abagaragu batagira umumaro, kuko twashohoje gusa ibyo twabwiwe gukora.’ Ntabwo ibyo akoze abifata nk’ideni ahaye uwo bashakanye.
Ese wowe ni ibiki uba wumva utegereje mu muntu mukundana / mwashakanye ariko ukumva utazi uko wabimubwira? Twandikire hasi muri comments, dufatanye kubaka umuryango nyarwanda urangwa n’ingo nziza!
