Kubaka imibanire myiza igice cya 4: kuvuga ukuri mu rukundo

Mu gice giheruka, twarebye ibyo abantu bashaka kubaka imibanire myiza hagati yabo, bashobora kuvuganaho igihe baganira. Mubyo bavuganaho harimo: gusangira ibyabaye mu buzima bwabo uwo munsi, amagambo yo gukomezanya, ibyo bashimirana ndetse n’ ibyo bahugurana. Abantu bamwe bavuga ibyo bashaka byose, ku buryo bamara kuvuga ugasigarana akazi ko kuvangura muri byinshi yakubwiye ngo ukuremo iby’ ukuri ukwiye kwemera  n’ ibitari ukuri ukwiye kwirengagiza. Abandi nabo usanga  bitwaza guhugurana bagakoresha amagambo akarishye ashobora no gukomeretsa umutima.  Muri iyi nyigisho turagaruka ku mwimerere w’ibyo tuvuga n’ uburyo bwiza bwo kubivugamo. Turareba ku  kuvuga ukuri mu rukundo.

Umwimerere w’ibyo tuvuga: ukuri 

Kimwe mu bintu umuntu ugenda mu modoka zitwara abagenzi mu buryo bwa rusange hano mu Rwanda atabura guhura nacyo, ni ukumva umuntu ubwira uwo bari kuvugana kuri telephone ngo ngeze aha naha, nyamara atariho imodoka murimo igeze. Kenshi usanga abantu babifata nk’ibintu bisanzwe cyangwa se bakabigira urwenya bagakomeza. Nyamara, ku Mana siko bimeze. Mu bintu by’ibanze Imana yihanangirije abantu bayo kudakora, harimo no kubeshya.¹ Ntugashinje ibinyoma mugenzi wawe.”
‭‭Kuva‬ ‭20:16‬ ‭BYSB‬‬ Umwanditsi w’igitabo cy’Imigani, kigaruka cyane ku kumvira amategeko y’Imana mu mibereho ya buri munsi, ashyira kubeshya mu bintu Imana yanga urunuka.² “Ururimi rubeshya ni ikizira ku Uwiteka, ahubwo anezezwa n’abakora iby’ukuri.” ‭‭Imigani‬ ‭12:22‬ ‭BYSB‬‬  
“Hariho ibintu bitandatu ndetse birindwi, Uwiteka yanga bimubera ikizira ni ibi: Amaso y’ubwibone, ururimi rubeshya, Amaboko avusha amaraso y’utariho urubanza, Umutima ugambirira ibibi, Amaguru yihutira kugira urugomo, Umugabo w’indarikwa uvuga ibinyoma, N’uteranya abavandimwe.” ‭‭Imigani‬ ‭6:16-19‬ ‭BYSB‬‬ Uretse n’ ibyo kandi kubeshya byangiza imibanire myiza mu buryo bukomeye. Usanga abantu benshi babikora bibeshya ko aribwo buryo bwatuma bagenzi babo batabatakariza icyizere. Nyamara ahubwo, nibyo bituma umuntu arushaho kugutakariza icyizere. Ibaze nk’ iyo umuntu akubwiye ngo ageze ahantu bisaba iminota 15 ngo ukugereho. Maze ukabona amaze isaha irenga atarakugeraho! Ese wumva ufitiye uwo muntu icyizere kingana iki?

Igituma kuvuga ukuri, kenshi bitugora ni kamere y’ icyaha itubamo. Iyo kamere ihora ishaka ko twigaragaza neza birenze uko turi. Nawe wibwije ukuri, urabizi ko hari n’igihe bitagusaba kugambirira kubeshya. Ahubwo umuntu yakubaza ikintu runaka, ukisanga wamubeshye no mu  bintu bidafite icyo bimaze. Maze nyuma ugasigara wigaya wibaza icyabiguteye bikagushobera. Ibyo nibyo byabaye kuri Adamu na Eva. Bashatse kwigaragaza uko batari n’ imbere y’ Imana ireba byose.³ “Amaso y’Uwiteka aba hose, Yitegereza ababi n’abeza.” Imigani‬ ‭15:3‬ ‭BYSB‬ “Nta cyaremwe kitagaragara imbere yayo, ahubwo byose bitwikuruwe nk’ibyambaye ubusa mu maso y’Izatubaza ibyo twakoze.” ‭‭Abeheburayo‬ ‭4:13‬ ‭BYSB‬‬‬ Bahitamo kwidodera ibicocero nubwo bitabashaga guhisha isoni zabo. Ni nk’ uko umuntu akubeshya aho ageze ngo utumva ko yatinze. Nyamara bikarangira akugezeho yakererewe. 

Inzira imwe yo gukira iyo ndwara yo gushaka kwigaragaza uko utari ni ukwemerera Imana akaba ariyo ikwambika nk’ uko yabikoze kuri Adamu na Eva. Bibiliya itubwira ko Imana imaze kubona ko ibyo bagerageje kwidodera byanze, yabaremeye imyambaro mu ruhu ikayibambika.⁴ Itangiriro 2:21 Ibyo byari igishushanyo cy’ibyo Imana yari buzakorere abizera bose muri Kristo. Gupfa kwa Yesu ku musaraba kwari ukugira ngo yishyireho isoni zacu zose maze abamwizera duhinduke intungane.⁵ Ubwe yikoreye ibyaha byacu mu mubiri we abibambanwa ku giti, kugira ngo dupfe ku byaha duhereko tubeho ku gukiranuka. Imibyimba ye ni yo yabakijije.”
‭‭1 Petero‬ ‭2:24‬ ‭BYSB‬‬   Kandi kubera ko kubeshya biva kuri kamere y’icyaha itubamo. Ntakindi kibikuraho keretse kwemerera Yesu akaza mu buzima bwawe maze akaguha kamere nshya⁶ “Umuntu wese iyo ari muri Kristo aba ari icyaremwe gishya, ibya kera biba bishize. Dore byose biba bihindutse bishya. Ariko ibyo byose bituruka ku Mana yiyunze natwe ku bwa Kristo, ikaduha umurimo wo kuyunga n’abandi, kuko muri Kristo ari mo Imana yiyungiye n’abari mu isi ntiyaba ikibabaraho ibicumuro byabo, kandi noneho yatubikije ijambo ry’umwuzuro.” ‭‭2 Abakorinto‬ ‭5:17-19‬ ‭BYSB‬‬ n’ impano y’ Umwuka wera uyobora abamufite mu kuri kose.⁷ “Uwo Mwuka w’ukuri naza azabayobora mu kuri kose kuko atazavuga ku bwe, ahubwo ibyo azumva ni byo azavuga, kandi azababwira ibyenda kubaho.” Yohana‬ ‭16:13‬ ‭BYSB‬‬ Mwuka wera aha umuntu kwisanga adafite impamvu yo kubeshya. Ahubwo, akumva kuvugisha ukuri aribyo bimubangukiye. Bitavuye mu mbaraga ze ahubwo kubera Mwuka wera utuye muri we. 

Ubushobozi bwo kuvugisha ukuri abizera tubuhabwa no kumenya ko Imana isumba byose yatwemeye uko turi.⁸ “ariko Imana yerekanye urukundo rwayo idukunda, ubwo Kristo yadupfiraga tukiri abanyabyaha.”
‭‭Abaroma‬ ‭5:8‬ ‭BYSB‬‬ Bityo ntiduterwa ipfunwe no kugaragara uko turi imbere y’ umuntu wese. Kuko Imana ubwayo yadukunze tukiri abanyabyaha. Nawe bitekerezeho neza. Ese uwo muntu ukwemera ari uko ubanje guhisha uwo uriwe cyangwa ibyakubayeho by’ ukuri,  aruta Imana yakwemeye ukiri umunyabyaha? Hari n’ ubwo usanga umuntu ahitamo kuvuga ikinyoma yitwaje ko ukuri guhari kutaryoheye amatwi. Nubwo ikinyoma gishobora kuryohera amatwi aka kanya ariko nyuma gisharirira umutima. Iyo uwo wabeshye abitahuye akagutakariza icyizere yari agufitiye. Kuvugisha ukuri nibwo buryo bwizewe bwo kubaka imibanire myiza hagati yawe n’ abawe kuko bishyiraho urufatiro rwo  kwizerana n’ubusabane bwuzuye. Kuvugisha ukuri si ikintu cyiza dukwiye kwitoza gusa. Ahubwo, ni n’itegeko Imana iduha nk’abizera. Abefeso 4:25 “Nuko mwiyambure ibinyoma, umuntu wese avugane ukuri na mugenzi we, kuko turi ingingo za bagenzi bacu’’

Uburyo tubivugamo: mu rukundo

Abantu bamwe bitwaza ko ibyo bavuga ari ukuri bakabivuga uko bashatse batitaye k’ uwo babwira, igihe n’ aho babivugira. Maze ugasanga bahutaje byinshi. Ukuri, gufite uburemere bwihariye muri iyi si yacu yangijwe n’ icyaha. Kuburyo uko byamera kose udashobora kugusimbuza ikinyoma. Icyo kuzirikana ni uburyo ukuvugamo kuko utakuvuze mu buryo bukwiriye wasanga wangije byinshi, ndetse rimwe na rimwe, kurusha ibyo wakijije. Ibyo Imana yabibonye kare, niyo mpamvu ijambo ryayo riduhamagarira kuvuga ukuri mu rukundo.⁹ Ahubwo tuvuge ukuri turi mu rukundo, dukurire muri we muri byose. Uwo niwe mutwe, ari wo Kristo. Abefeso 4:15 Ukuri kose gukwiye kuvugwa mu rukundo. Wibuke ko urukundo rwihangana rukagira neza. Urukundo ntirugira ishyari. Urukundo ntirwirarira, ntirwihimbaza, ntirukora ibiteye isoni, ntirushaka ibyarwo, ntiruhutiraho, ntirutekereza ikibi ku bantu, ntirwishimira gukiranirwa kw’abandi ahubwo rwishimira ukuri, rubabarira byose, rwizera byose, rwiringira byose, rwihanganira byose.¹⁰ ‭‭1 Abakorinto‬ ‭13:4-7‬ ‭BYSB‬‬  

Ibyo birushaho kuba ngombwa iyo abantu bahugurana. Igihe cyose ukeneye kubwira mugenzi wawe amakosa ye, cyangwa se ibindi bitagenda neza, bikwiye gukorwa mu rukundo n’ ubugwaneza. Urugero rwagufasha kubyumva neza, ni igihe wenda waba uri mu rugo cyangwa mu kazi. Maze ukarangara hakagira ikintu cyangirika. Muri uko kwangirika nawe ukagira ibyo uhomba. Kubera ibyo wahombye no kuba wowe ubwawe ubizi ko byatewe n’ uburangare bwawe, ukigaya ndetse ukumva ugize agahinda. Bigatuma ufata ingamba zituma ibyabaye bitazongera. Nyuma y’ amasaha runaka uwo mubana cyangwa se umwe mu bagukuriye mu kazi akaza. Yabona ibyangiritse akagutonganya. Bikamara nk’ icyumweru cyose adasiba kongera kugusubiriramo ukuntu warangaye ibintu bikangirika. Ese wakumva umeze ute? Nubwo ibyo avuga ari ukuri, ariko gukomeza kubigusubiriramo bituma uko kuri kukubabaza ndetse kukaba gushobora no kugukomeretsa umutima.

Urundi rugero rwagufasha kubyumva ni igihe umugabo cyangwa umugore adatinya kuvuga amakosa y’ uwo bashakanye mu ruhame cyangwa mu ijwi riranguruye. Akabikora n’ igihe afite uburakari cyangwa agahinda. Ese urwo rugo urufata ute? Wakwifuza ko umuryango wawe cyangwa abaturanyi bawe bamera gutyo? Ntekereza ko utabyifuza! Nubwo ibyo bavuga byose byaba ari ukuri ntawubeshyera mugenzi we. Kuba batavuga ukuri mu rukundo, bituma ntawifuza kuba nkabo cyangwa kubana nabo. Ubabona wese avuga ko babanye nabi kandi urugo rwabo rwuzuye intonganya.

Ubushobozi bwo kuvuga ukuri mu rukundo, n’ igihe mugenzi wawe yagukoreye amakosa, abizera babukura mu kuzirikana ibyo Imana yabakoreye muri Kristo. Muri Kristo, Imana yatubabariye ibirenze ibyo mugenzi wawe yaba yagukoreye ibyo aribyo byose. Kuzirikana izo mbabazi z’ Imana muri Kristo, bicubya uburakari bwose maze wajya kuvugana na mugenzi wawe ukagenda wuzuye umutima w’ ubugwaneza.¹¹ “Mugirirane neza, mugirirane imbabazi, mubabarirane ibyaha nk’uko Imana yabababaririye muri Kristo.” ‭‭Abefeso‬ ‭4:32‬ ‭BYSB‬‬ n’ iyo yaba yagukoreye amakosa ameze ate. Imwe mu nyungu zo kuvuga ukuri mu rukundo ni uko bitera abandi umwete wo kurushaho kuvuga ukuri. Iyo ubwiye umuntu amakosa ye ukabikorana urukundo n’ ubugwaneza. Bituma ashobora kugufungukira akaba yakubwira icyamuteye kugwa muri ayo makosa. Ku buryo, habaye hari n’ ubufasha akeneye yabasha kubusaba. Maze muri ubwo bufatanye mukabasha kubaka imibanire myiza.

Bitekerezeho neza…

Ese wowe wumva kuvuga ukuri mu rukundo ari ikintu kikubangukiye? Ukuri ni uko kubwa kamere zacu kuvuga ukuri kandi ukakuvuga mu rukundo biratugora. Ariko ibyo, Imana yari ibizi ni cyo cyatumye itanga Umwana wayo kugira ngo umwizera abashe guhinduka icyaremwe gishya¹² “Umuntu wese iyo ari muri Kristo aba ari icyaremwe gishya, ibya kera biba bishize. Dore byose biba bihindutse bishya.” ‭‭2 Abakorinto‬ ‭5:17‬ ‭BYSB‬‬ ashobore kuvuga ukuri ari mu rukundo¹³ Ahubwo tuvuge ukuri turi mu rukundo, dukurire muri we muri byose. Uwo niwe mutwe, ari wo Kristo. Abefeso 4:15 Nawe niba utaramwizera, fata akanya nonaha usenge usaba Imana kuguha ubuzima bushya muri Kristo. Niba kandi wumva udasobanukiwe n’ icyo bivuze kwizera Yesu. Wakurikira inyigisho yitwa Iby’ ibanze ngo ugire urushako rwiza igice cya 1 iragufasha kumenya icyo bivuze Kwizera Yesu. (Kanda hano)

Niba waramaze kwizera Yesu, ariko ukaba ukigorwa no kuvugisha ukuri mu rukundo nawe humura nturi wenyine, Mwuka wera yiteguye kugushoboza kuvugisha ukuri mu rukundo komeza ubimusabe kandi ubyitoze ntagucika intege. 

Ese wowe n’ uwo mwashakanye cyangwa muri kurambagizanya muhirimbanira kubwirana ukuri kandi mu rukundo?

Ese ni kangahe uzirikana ibyo Imana yakubabariye muri Kristo mbere yo kuronderera abandi amakosa bagukoreye?

Imana idufashe!